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This same picture is on my desk for inspiration while I work on the computer.
DINNERS GALORE: This weekend, I spent more money than I needed to in the name of eating outside the house. Friday, I went to Cactus Club with Jory to eat before we rented a movie. Saturday, I went to Foggy Dew's for a birthday dinner. Sunday, I was supposed to go to Earl's for a work dinner but it was so busy, we went to Cactus Club across the street instead. The link between all three days? I had chicken wings as part of my meal each time. Another useless factoid that will appear in FunBo jeopardy one day.
theonion.com TOP ARTICLES:Once again, I have come through with some solid articles from the definitive source of humor, The Onion
BASKETBALL JONES:Another stellar, but not too eventful week of ball this past week. Wednesday, church ball returned after a one week hiatus. The group was a small one, with only 6 people this week. We had some good 3 on 3 games going and we capped it off with a brutal and punishing game of 2 on 2. It was pure ghetto.
On thursday, Jeff and I went to the court in our neighbourhood to play. We played a game of one on one that was killer because the heat was crazy. To cool off, we played a game of 21 that was epic. I was winning 19-11 and I shot for 20 and went to the free throw line having to only hit the rim and then get another 1 pointer later. Instead I got the free throw in and went back down to 1. However, I sunk 10 free throws in a row and won 21-11. To boot, I hit what was about a half-court shot on a real court after the game to give me 14 shots in a row that went in. I should've bought a lotto ticket that night.
SALMON AWARD: Due to my lack of betting prowess in golf, Jeff won another salmon award. He is the proud owner of the "Honorary Merit Platinum Plated Chartreuse Soft-Tee Award For Unheralded Bravery When
When Using My Skin In The Line Of Duty For The Well-Being Of Earth And Its Inhabitants". If anyone deserves that award, it's J-Funk himself.
BABE BATTLE 15:Last week, Roberta Barrera beat Sarah Spraker in what was a surprise to me, 11 votes to 7. This week, Coyote Ugly's Izabella Miko goes up against Bring It On's Eliza Dushku. CLICK HERE TO VOTE ON THIS WEEK'S BATTLE.
WORD ON THE STREET: I had a very bad day sunday (among other things,
I finished the newsletter and my computer froze before I could save it and upload
it). But I realized there are worse things than what I have been through today
so I made a comic about it. CLICK HERE TO SEE THIS WEEK'S
COMIC.
COYOTE: I went to Coyote on thursday and it sucked from the jumpoff. We got there at 11 and got in around 12, just in time for battle of the sexes. Except for the rare occasion, it's usually a huge disappointment. This time was no different. All the girls wussed out and showed absolutely nothing. On top of that, some roly poly guy was showing his ass and another guy was buck naked, cupping his nuts like Warren does when he comes out of the bathroom after a shower. It was a horrible experience. After that, they played just a few good songs and then it was raver city techno crap. It was bad. We were there for no longer than an hour and a half before we bolted. That's why I say we should go somewhere else on thursdays every now and then.
GOLF:Monday, Jeff and I went golfing and the stakes were high. The player who won the most holes would win a salmon award and the winner in score got a free slurpee. Things looked good at first for me, but it all fell apart at the end as I collapsed like a house of cards hit by a breeze.
On thursday, after basketball, Jeff and I went for another round of golf. This time, he brought his cousin along too. This girl is the ultimate ringer. At first, she made it seem like she doesn't golf, suddenly a few holes later, she's barely missing hole in one's. Awfully suspicious if you ask me. Jeff beat me again though so I owe him some candy now too.
PING-PONG: After golf, I was in desperate need to re-establish my power in sports so I invited Jeff over for 3 games of ping-pong. I expected to run him over with ease but I did anything but that. Yes, I won all three games but by scores of 21-11, 21-19 and 21-16. Hardly anything to brag about. Jeff, you have potential to one day be the next me. Don't squander that amazing gift.
BASEBALL POOL UPDATE: I failed on a beautiful opportunity to make ground on Jory's team and regain the lead. Jory's didn't have the strongest week and I was having a killer week with my position players. However, my pitching was so weak that I actually lost points with them (i think) overall for the week. Because of that, I found myself losing to Jory by 10 points this week. Jory stretched out his overall lead to leave the standings like this after four weeks:
| BIG BAMBINO BABE RUTH (Jory) | 1387 |
| Cool Mother Funkers (Bobby) | 1304 |
| Rocky Balboa (Warren) | 1175 |
| Friday Night (Jerred) | 1090 |
Chris' team continues to go without a roster.
SURVIVOR 2: Elisabeth got the boot this week and the show became a little uglier now. She was predictably picked off by the trio of Tina, Keith and Colby. And then there were three. In other news, the reward challenge was a pentathlon that involved previous challenges like blindfolding and shackles. Colby and his hot streak ran a rampage again and he won a hot meal, and got to sleep in a Pontiac Aztek which he will take home after the game. The immunity challenge was a memory game that involved matching items that were under covers, kinda like that memory card game. Colby had the most matches and proved he is brains and brawn. He won immunity and lives to see another day.
AFRO NEWS: No funky hair for church ball this weekend. I had to walk to the church so no time to funkdafy my hair. However, on thursday, I had the craziest afro ever. Jeff as my witness, this thing had heat. It was impressive.
FUNBO RECORD REVIEW: This week, I'm reviewing westcoast supergroup Deltron 3030's self-titled debut from 2000. The group consists of dj extrodinaire Kid Koala, avant-garde producer Dan "The Automator" Nakamura and Ice Cube's zany cousin, Del Tha Funkee Homosapien. The album has a futuristic theme as it's title would suggest. Automator and Koala do a good job providing the right musical backdrop and Del's lyrics co-exist smoothly with the astral sound. Not once does his flow seem labored or forced. Even the skits are good. The albums highlights are the title track, Things You Can Do, Positive Contact, Virus, Mastermind and Memory Loss.
WARREN'S COOL THING OF THE WEEK: Warren's cool thing of the week is coming home. It's cool because he says "it's better than leaving". Warren, that brought a tear to my eye.
RANDOM NOTES: Jay Leno has yet to write back...Coyote Ugly is such a brilliant concept: chick flick with a cast of hot girls...why do i bet on golf when I never win? who knows...Warren, sorry I was being a dink on sunday morning. You know how girls can get you in a pissy mood in a hurry? That's my excuse...Darren, we need to play tennis...FunBo's parting shot: I hate talking on the phone to girls...I'm out like Manzone tv reception.
Below is the list of past issues along with some of the highlights:
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